Words to Live By

Advice from a Dying 24 Year-old


Reblogged from  Make It Ultra Psychology  a very cool and insightful blog that I recommend you at least visit because once you do I am certain you will then follow.

This post was written by an insightful  young man over a year ago. In my heart and soul, I can only hope he was able to realize that just by taking the time to type these words he would not only make his mark he would continue on making it again and again.

His writing affected me in a way I was not expecting. To be honest, I have read it several times.  Normally, I would immediately go to a place of grief and extreme sadness for the loss of such a young man. I have a son his age and I simply cannot fathom bearing witness to him suffering through such devastating illness with the knowledge that he had such little time left to live.

I am saddened, but I am also filled with jubilation for this young man, because I truly believe this young mans purpose was achieved just by existing and writing the following words.

These are indeed words to live by.


“Soon I will be gone forever, but that’s okay as long as someone reads this. I am only 24 years old, yet I have actually already chosen my last tie. It’s the one that I will wear on my funeral a few months from now. It may not match my suit, but I think it’s perfect for the occasion.


The cancer diagnosis came too late to give me at least a tenuous hope for a long life, but I realized that the most important thing about death is to ensure that you leave this world a little better than it was before you existed with your contributions . The way I’ve lived my life so far, my existence or more precisely the loss of it, will not matter because I have lived without doing anything impactful.


Before, there were so many things that occupied my mind. When I learned how much time I had left, however, it became clear which things are really important. So, I am writing to you for a selfish reason. I want to give meaning to my life by sharing with you what I have realized:

  • Don’t waste your time on work that you don’t enjoy. It is obvious that you cannot succeed in something that you don’t like. Patience, passion, and dedication come easily only when you love what you do.
  • It’s stupid to be afraid of others’ opinions. Fear weakens and paralyzes you. If you let it, it can grow worse and worse every day until there is nothing left of you, but a shell of yourself. Listen to your inner voice and go with it. Some people may call you crazy, but some may even think you‘re a legend.
  • Take control of your life Take full responsibility for the things that happen to you. Limit bad habits and try to lead a healthier life. Find a sport that makes you happy. Most of all, don’t procrastinate. Let your life be shaped by decisions you made, not by the ones you didn’t.
  • Appreciate the people around you Your friends and relatives will always be an infinite source of strength and love. That is why you shouldn’t take them for granted.

It is difficult for me to fully express my feelings about the importance of these simple realizations, but I hope that you will listen to someone who has experienced how valuable time is.

I’m not upset because I understand that the last days of my life have become meaningful. I only regret that I will not be able to see a lot of cool stuff that should happen soon like the creation of AI, or Elon Musk’s next awesome project. I also hope that the war in Syria and Ukraine will end soon.

We care so much about the health and integrity of our body that until death, we don’t notice that the body is nothing more than a box – a parcel for delivering our personality, thoughts, beliefs and intentions to this world. If there is nothing in this box that can change the world, then it doesn’t matter if it disappears. I believe that we all have potential, but it also takes a lot of courage to realize it.

You can float through a life created by circumstances, missing day after day, hour after hour. Or, you can fight for what you believe in and write the great story of your life. I hope you will make the right choice.

Leave a mark in this world. Have a meaningful life, whatever definition it has for you. Go towards it. The place we are leaving is a beautiful playground, where everything is possible. Yet, we are not here forever. Our life is a short spark in this beautiful little planet that flies with incredible speed to the endless darkness of the unknown universe. So, enjoy your time here with passion. Make it interesting. Make it count!

Thank you!”

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My Very First Post

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I have thought and thought about the self-imposed importance of my very first post. What can I possibly say about the start of this new journey?  Originally, this was intended to be something my kids could look back on. I’ve written before, but after a fairly serious brain surgery left me with a few deficits, I didn’t know if I would be able to do it again. The fact is some day I hope to reach people, touch them even. I mean, this is kinda big right? Probably not, but to me it is.

So….. Should I begin seriously? Explaining how monumentally my life changed when I finally realized I was going to remain very sick? Or speak on how I let that same illness, and the doctors, surgeries, hospitals and daily life stress defeat and ultimately define me for years?  Honestly the best answer is probably somewhere along the lines of… I  should just be me, at times sarcastic but usually laughing despite ALL of it. I can finally do that now, and that is and was always truly me.

Pre-illness,  I could find laughter in any situation. And I was always going.  I was also always the one getting people together to do things. Always the one who volunteered for every parental school thing that came up.  The team mom for any and most of my kids various sporting activities. I was IN IT! Until I wasn’t. The illness started slowly and even in times of extreme fear, it would comfort me to send entire surgical teams into gales of laughter, right before they were ready to knock me out. Weirdly in my darkest days, I also found comfort in my norm of updating people inquiring about my health by saying something close to “everything is fine” or ” I’m getting better each day”. Then <insert sarcastic/cheesy joke > and BIG SMILE. But still….comfort.

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